My husband and I were married 10 years before we had children.  We never thought we wanted any.  But then we both got hit with the same brick, thank goodness, and we were ready.  I had terminated two pregnancies when I was young and with my Catholic background, I guess I was afraid to have children thinking in some way that maybe God would punish me.

We were so excited about this new season in our lives.  When our son was born, we sat in the hospital holding him, and this tangible love fell all around us.  We could feel it!  We didn’t know what it was.  I asked my husband, “Do you feel that?”  And he said, “Yes.”  I knew then that it just wasn’t me making it up.  There was this love in the room for this child, a love we had never known.  We didn’t even know there were different kinds of love until that moment.  I remember saying to my husband, “Can you believe that we almost chose not to experience this love, the love for a child?”

I was so amazed.  I could not believe that God was blessing me so.  I deserved to be punished, or so I thought.  Later I found the cross, the place where I could bring my sins and mistakes to receive God’s forgiveness.  But God in His goodness and grace choose to envelope us in that room that day and gift us with this healthy, baby boy that we could love the way He loved me.  God is so good.  He’s a good Father.

KH